How do you say...

"you're going to hell" to some of your closest friends?

I am at such a loss right now for words...or thoughts of encouragement. And then it dons on me.. That's the problem "thoughts of encouragement...words" << those feelings..that kind of thinking..that is what is trapping so many of my friends ..condeming them to an eternity in hell.

The "I can fix it" mantra...and the perversion of God's plan for salvation..morphing it into some kind of after dinner mint idea that we can earn our way into heaven... That's what I see many of my friends deluding themselves into believing.

I know what I should do. I should trust God. I should trust that He will provide me with the strength and the words to proclaim the Truth to my friends. I shouldn't allow fear to overcome me. I know I shouldn't ...I know I need to pray.

If you read this..please pray for me in this area of my life.

Wow...

I have been doing a small groups study with 2 ladies from my church every Thursday evening. I am soooo thankful that God has put us together. We have only met 3 times, yet I have been blessed so much already by our Lord - I can't put it into words.

I don't know why, but every time the subject of "small groups" comes up at church, I cringe (when we're leading up to start a new term of small groups) I get this "ugh, again???" attitude about it. It is so silly to feel that way, and so WRONG! Each small group I have been a part of has been absolutely amazing!

I'm very lucky...very blessed to be able to have this experience.

I feel myself growing as a Christian in the sight of our Lord..and it is great.

Been in hiding...

I know its been a long time since my last post. A lot has been going on, and I just haven't had the energy to post.

I'm battling a health inconvience that is getting me down. I keep having these painful chest pains (which causes shortness of breath). My doctor doesn't know what is causing it..and his office has yet to call me back for a stress test appointment. It keeps me from exercising, and I just feel like a big pile of blob right now!

Oh well... life goes on - either here, or in eternity.

There isn't much reason for this post, other than to announce that I'm still alive!

Temptations

What's some of your temptations?

I have a few that keep surfacing. Other people may find some of them to be silly, but it is a real challenge to me.

MySpace - Temptation (1). A while back, an online friend of mine introduced me to myspace. I eagerly started to make a page, being the 'net junkie I am. John noticed what I was doing, and asked me to not make a site.

Why? Because of all of the negative issues surrounding it. You hear about it all the time, and if you are a myspacer, probably see it often - people using myspace to "hook up". Then there's the vulgar things you see on the pages. I'm not talking about someone making an inappropriate page, but the comments their friends leave. And yes, I do understand that as the "owner" of the site, you can remove comments made on your page. But the fact remains, the reputation that My Space has, is one that makes me uncomfortable. I don't want to have to give an explanation about how my site "isn't like those others" when I tell someone I have a myspace account. I don't want to rationalize it.

So why is this a problem? BECAUSE I REALLY WANT TO MAKE A PAGE! What's the big deal? I feel that God has convicted me in not getting involved with this. I'm reminded of 2 Timothy 2:3-5.

Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No one serving as a soldier gets involved in civilian affairs—he wants to please his commanding officer. Similarly, if anyone competes as an athlete, he does not receive the victor's crown unless he competes according to the rules.

Every timee one of my friends show me their myspace pages, I start feeling left out, almost envious. I want to "join the group". I know I'm in trouble with it when I start to rationalize the reasons around making a page. (To me) Rationalization is convincing the mind something is right that the spirit knows is wrong.

Ugh. So what is the point of this rant? Is it to whine about not being able to make a page? (maybe, a little). But mainly, its just to show that there are others out there that have daily struggles with "little things". And its important to stick to your convictions, no matter how trivial they may seem when scrutinized.

Ok, rant off. =)

hmm, title?

Ever feel like just screaming? Or, how about just going "blahhhhhh"? That's how I feel off and on right now. I am being bombarded with a ton of junk right now. I'm easily frustrated with things. I am trying hard to focus. I pray when I'm feeling this way. I thank God for allowing me the things in my life that do frustrate me (Glad that I have kids, husband, a job, etc).

It seems like Satan is attacking me around every corner right now. And I guess, it makes sense. I know God has things He wants me to do, and Satan will try everything to stop that.

....

On a positive note, I finally wrote my step-mother a letter of apology for being such a jerk to her when I first met her (and until I moved away). She should get it by the end of the week. I pray that it helps.

Well, laundry is calling my name. Until next time!

Labor Day Weekend

We went to Myrtle Beach for the weekend (we were there Friday-Monday). It was a very lovely trip. It was the first time that both of our kids were at the beach. Nate had a blast. He is fearless when it comes to waves!!! Kierstyn had lots of fun, too.

There was some head-butting with John's parents though. Pray that God does a LOT of work in that area =(

But, mostly the trip was great.
Saturday John and his father went golfing, while I took Kierstyn swimming. (Nate was asleep at that time). Saturday night, John and I had a little "date night" we went walking on the beach for a while and then went out for ice cream. Sunday we took the kids to the beach, and then we went out to the mall (the mall in Myrtle Beach is lousy!). We also took Kierstyn putt-putt golfing. Monday we headed out around 9am and got home around 2pm.

I'm glad to be back home!

Being convicted

I've started reading the book "Through Gates of Splendor" By Elisabeth Elliot. The first two chapters have been a humbling experience. I realize that I don't give my life to God. Well, not how I should. I have too much of a hold on this life. I read how Jim and Pete were both just bursting with excitement to serve God in missionary work. The attitudes in which they approached things is inspiring.

It has made me realize how much I focus on the "now" and not on The Spirit. I'm thankful that God has shown me this. I'm thankful that He doesn't allow me to feel that I've "got it right". It helps me continue to learn humility.

I'm slowly learning what it truly means to love our Lord. Its not some abstract idea we throw around to make ourselves sound good. Its a deep, moving feeling that grips you by the chest and makes it to where you can hardly breathe. Its.......something more than anything I could type here could come close to describe.

I'm very fortunate that God has opened my heart and allowed me to love Him. I just pray that He can take this lingering desire for this world away.

Marriage retreat

Was wonderful!!!!!! I can't describe how great it feels to come back after the retreat feeling so -- in love. Its amazing what God's grace can do for you. I don't think I will ever be able to comprehend it.

We had such a great time while we were there. We were up in the mountains at Ridgecrest, NC. Talk about a workout!!! We were right smack in middle of a mountain. Our marriage race was quite a feat! I still can't get over the fact that WE WON THE RACE!! I thought for a while I was going to drop dead from exhaustion as we trekked up a huge hill. It was all good though.

I can't wait to go next year!! John and I will be the facilitators of the race -- watch out everyone!!

Peace in Submission

..Yeah, you read the title right. And yes, I, Shannon, am saying you can find peace in submission. Yes, me, the headstrong, stubborn, "women's lib all the way", "I DON'T NEED A MAN TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO"---yes, that girl...Is saying that there is peace in submission.
I remember when John and I were first married, and we were talking about submission, and how a wife is to submit to her husband. I thought I was going to have an aneurysm. He supported his side with scripture, and we prayed about it. I think he prayed more than I did - lots more. I'll be honest. I hated the idea of having to be submissive to him. I grew up in a very matriarchal family. All of the women, my grandmother, aunt, mother, sister, all of them "ruled" their marriages. So to hear someone tell me "nuh uh" on that...Well, yeah, that flew over well.

Thankfully, God is faithful, and he started changing my heart. He has taken the thorn of "utter independance" out of my side, and replaced it with a husband that doesn't dangle my submissive role over my head.

I have learned that there's so much freedom in submission!

I can only explain it through the power of our Lord. As we live according to His will, we are rewarded. It is His will that a wife submit to her husband.

Of course, this is not the general concensus of our society. I get made fun of by my female friends at work when we discuss this matter. They tell me how they put "their man" in place, etc. I'm told that I'm nieve for letting John have control of the situation. Sometimes I'm even told that I'm stupid for not "stepping up" in the relationship. Taking the submissive role isn't easy. We see daily how that's not the norm. We are ridiculed when we don't conform to that norm. I believe Satan attacks us in this area with a brutal force, because if he can make us err here, it affects our marriage, our family, and our worship.

All I can say is pray about it. Pray about having a submissive spirit. Pray that God gives you delight in being submissive. Act on faith, and trust in Him to take care of things.

Sisters...

I have been thinking about my sisters lately. Wondering how they are doing, where they are, what they are up to, etc. I haven't heard from one of my sisters in at least 7 years. There was a huge family blow up involving her, and she has made herself distant since then. Her children haven't heard from her in a few years (they live with my aunt now). I have tried locating her a few times, all to no avail. I would like the chance to apologise to her for how we all acted toward her.
My other sister, I haven't heard from in about 6 months. She (like the rest of my family) lives in Texas, and her phone was disconnected a while ago. She's not in a good situation, and I fear that she really doesn't want that to change.
I was wondering what I could do to make "things better". Then I realized, the only thing I CAN do is pray.

Pain!!!

Ugh! I just got home from the dentist, and man am I in pain! He had to do a tooth build up and put a temp crown on. I go back in 3 weeks. All my fun numb shot is gone now and I am feeling the wrath of that tiny drill and all of his contraptions. *whimper*

Forever Thankful

Pastor Scott's post (8/16) made me think...His question was about what you have a thing for. This question made me think of my past, and all the various things I used to worship. Yes, I use the word worship, because I let these things consume my life! I was always an obsessive: internet junkie, car nut, boy crazy, movie addict, the "cool one", etc.

I am so thankful that through God's grace, He has changed me from that person!!! I'm also thankful that He has forgiven me for all my sins. The thought of how lost I would be without him is frightening. He is helping me shed my earthy desires, which is something I would be powerless to without Him.

I wish I could sum up exactly how I feel in words, but its too powerful. All I can say is THANK YOU GOD! Thank you for loving me, thank you for choosing me, thank you for your faithfulness, thank you thank you thank you!!!

Sunday School Olympics

Wow, what a blast! I don't know what I laughed at more - watching the kids drop potatoes in a bucket from their knees, or John running the obstacle course! I was in tears!!! It seemed like everyone had fun though, which is what is important.

I wanted to say that I'm really proud of our older youth. They have so much enthusiasm!

I can't wait to see all the pictures and videos that were taken!

Runnin' on empty

Ok so this is my first entry..and as usual, I'm running late for something, so this will be brief. But hey, that's what life is like..always on the move. Right? Don't tell me I'm alone here in my headless-chicken race!!!!!

Anywho..I'll post more tonight (gives me an excuse not to read quite as much physics as I would normally ..haha!)